How Lebanon became the first step of a long journey.

How Lebanon became the first step of a long journey.
Morning manouches in Beirut with Tom Adam pyjamas ๐ŸŒฏ๐Ÿ’›

Hello & Welcome ๐ŸŒž

I started this website to allow those interested to follow my adventure. On Insta or Tiktok, I feel constrained by the short format, less than one minute, having to be in front of the camera, and following the latest trends.

In case you havenโ€™t landed on my About page yet, Iโ€™ll start by introducing myself and tell you more about the adventure I refer to above.

I'm Full Beige. I'm 29 and have recently decided to dedicate a big part of my life to becoming a good pianist and music producer. Let's rewind a few years back to understand what triggered this decision.

I spent the last 4 years working heads down on a tech startup I co-founded in Berlin. When I started, I was driven by using technology to solve concrete needs and help people feel fulfilled by focusing on what matters to them. I am grateful for all the learnings and people I met through this experience. I had the chance to work with very talented, passionate, and humble individuals. As a result, I now have a better understanding of the challenges and processes that come with creating a successful tech project.

For many years, my co-founder and I were putting our noses to the grindstone to keep the company financially healthy. The intellectual challenge was exciting. But as the years went by, I became increasingly frustrated with expressing myself through numbers and fundraising. Something was gently ruminating inside of me but took me a while to fully realize it.

Then Lebanon happened, and that was one of the triggers that prompted me to change my life. I had the chance to hang out with many Lebanese people in Berlin, and last summer, my friend and photographer Choucri Bechir invited us to visit Lebanon and spend some time with his family. This trip was a fantastic opportunity to change one's mind, discover a new country and its culture, and take a step back on my life. Moreover, I was part of a next-level team of friends. The yogi master Syd, the colorful creative Row, the hilarious pyjama maker Tom & the most thoughtful human I know Choucri.

For the first time in a while, I had the time & space I needed to hear my thoughts, think of my desires, and ask myself the right questions. It was hard to face my questions and doubts, mainly because I didn't know if I was ready to find an answer. But I wanted to listen to my wishes, knowing they would lead my next chapter. I knew Beirut would be the perfect place to question my past choices and the main activities that occupied a big part of my life.

As you probably already know, Lebanon is going through the biggest economic and political crises in its history. Despite the extremely challenging situation in the country, the Lebanese people welcomed us very warmly, and I felt at home.

They all have hopes for a Lebanon as radiant as their joy of living. Seeing them taking care of each other and enjoying life's little pleasures was so beautiful. It made me realize that even if the situation is complicated, you must surround yourself with the right people who will know how to ask you the right questions to put your emotions and desires into words.

I remember a special moment during the trip, I was on the terrace of a guest house overlooking the mountains, and Tom and Choucri saw me thinking. I was asking myself hundreds of questions and was having difficulty putting order in this chaos of thoughts. They were extraordinarily kind to sit next to me and asked me simple questions to help me see more clearly without imposing their way. They knew I was no longer happy with my life as a tech entrepreneur, and I needed a fresh perspective as I was getting ready to enter a new decade. We are all busy dealing with our own challenges. so it's never easy to put aside some time to help a friend see things more clearly.

Thanks to this beautiful & vulnerable conversation in this village, I could truly listen to my inner desire to return to something more authentic and sensitive, to experience an alternative to the perpetual search for growth.

A few years later, I went back to Berlin, and after realizing that my friend & co-founder Louis had similar reflections, we decided to close the company. A big thank you to him for handling the admin part!

For the first time in a long while, I finally have plenty of free time to experiment, set myself challenges, and prioritize my passions.

For the last ten years, I've been wanting to learn the piano and devote more of my time to it. However, shortly after I bought my first piano and spent a few hours learning, I quickly realized the journey will be way longer than I expected. My desire to bring as many people together through music was often frowned upon by pianists claiming that it was impossible to learn the piano at a serious level that late. However, the last thirty years taught me to stop letting others choose for me because it's never too late to undertake a new endeavor. Life is long and fulfilling if we take the time to listen to ourselves carefully, and itโ€™s never too late to discover something new about it

I never understood the goal of achieving perfection before 30. Life seems a lot more fun, calming, and enjoyable when you keep in mind that you have your whole life to find what makes you tick. In that sense, I prefer to stay focused on those seemingly-unattainable dreams I want to reach. Each attempt at something new will help me understand and define myself better. But I must find ways to stay fulfilled and measure progress. I could probably get a feel of my progress thanks to your feedback.

I know I won't get it right the first time, and I may doubt my ability to compose pieces with my little piano. But I count on you to come with me on this adventure and to tell me when I will be on the right track. I hope you will also enjoy following my journey and listening to the compositions. In my newsletter and on social networks, I will share my new compositions, discoveries, learnings, fears, failures, and small successes we often forget to celebrate.

So if you're interested in following the adventure, don't forget to subscribe.

I want to thank my friends warmly for their kindness and for always listening to me.
Row - Syd - Choucri & Tom ๐Ÿ’›


I wish you a lovely day.
It's now time to play piano in my tiny Berlin studio.

Full ๐Ÿ’›

Music studio in Berlin.